when i was a kid i was in love with John Lennon. he was, and still is, my favourite Beatle (i always thought Paul was a pretty boy!). i would endlessly listen to a copy of the 1988 Imagine: John Lennon soundtrack that my uncle recorded for my mom on cassette, often on headphones as i was falling asleep at night. one summer i bought a pair of iconic John Lennon round-eye sunglasses on a trip to Wasaga Beach and wore them everyday, devoutly, for which my family aptly called me "little Lennon." when they wore out, i bought a new pair. as a teenager, i rekindled my childhood love for both the Beatles and more specifically for John, connecting more deeply with his lyrics, philosphy, and political actions. when assigned a portrait project in a highschool art class, i naturally chose to draw John. to this day, it is the only life-like portrait i have ever produced in charcoal, and one of which i am oddly proud (it still hangs framed in my mom's living room). i used a blurred and softened photo of the original drawing to make the above image.
i always thought the song John wrote for his son Sean (
Beautiful Boy (Darling Boy)) was absolute magic, and that it contained what might be the best words of wisdom from a father: "life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans." i always find myself returning to this simple but thoughtful life lesson: life happens, often when you least expect it, or are to busy to notice.
i have been absent from this blog for the past couple months, and rather than feel bad about it, i have accepted that life happens. my plans for the month of November onwards exploded, in the face of, well, life. i left the city to be with andrew so that i could write my comprehensive exams in peace & quiet, but as soon as i arrived he had to take me to the hospital for a health issue that turned out to be physically and emotionally exhausting for both of us. i have been on sick leave ever since and am only now gearing up to return to my studies. while not under the best of circumstances, i think that my body was assertively telling me that i needed to take a break. so i did. for the first month, i did (almost) nothing and actually relaxed, nurturing my condition, but also my mind. i started to feel restless and anxious, and even guilty for doing so little and not being very productive, having to constantly remind myself to just take time. time to heal, to reflect, to endure, to calm, to slow down, to breathe, and to let things unfold. we didn't get internet installed until the week before Christmas (it is amazing how difficult getting service in a small town can be!), so i was literally disconnected and truly on my own while andrew spent long days at work in the backcountry. while it was lonely and incredibly frustrating at times, it was also refreshing and deeply nurturing. i put everything on pause, realizing that the pressure of the world "out there" could wait and would continue on without me. and really, what was i missing?
during this time, we also welcomed a new member to the family. meet Glasgow, our 11-month-old rescued dog, whom we believe to be a Shepherd/Saint Bernard or similar mix. actually having the time to spend with him when we first brought him home was so important (for all of us), and he has already changed our lives in innumerable and immeasuable ways. we are training him to be a bush dog so that andrew can take him to work in the forest.
and so, as the new year begins (although it has been somewhat delayed for me due to a stubborn and irritating cold/flu), i truly feel that 2012 is going to be a good one. finally. i am looking forward to so many positive changes and opportunities for growth this year. re-uniting and moving back in with andrew by spring/early summer. transitioning to small-town life. getting married in August. planning a wedding. developing and focussing my small business and working hard to take it somewhere (look for changes in the coming months and possible re-branding, although i am still undecided...). completing my comps and diving into my own research. writing more. wasting time less, or redirecting some of my time & energy. discovering what kind of blogger i am and will be and moulding a proper place for this blog in my life. developing a realistic routine that i can actually stick to, which for me also means working hard to become a morning person. spending more time in the bush this summer. uncovering all the good local food producers and continuing to improve our sustainable living efforts. living a simple, balanced life, or as close to one as possible.
i hope your 2012 is filled with wonder, love, & happiness.
xo, sara